Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
