check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
