with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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