Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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