If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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