I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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