You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
