It's like God shit irony all over that family
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
