did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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