so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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