I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
