I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
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