So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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