Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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