Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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