Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
