You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
