I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize