We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
