community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
