i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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