we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Randomize
