16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize