On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
PANTIES FOUND
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