don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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