Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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