Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I am spending my child support on dildos
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
