That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
