Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
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