It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
My feet surprised me
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