plz talk dirty to me
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
