Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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