i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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