It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
