Just fell off a train. Bad.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
