come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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