Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
