I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
She's the barista slut.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
