I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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