sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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