I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
