Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize