i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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