Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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