Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize