Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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