what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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