Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
hell yes lets make some ravioli
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Randomize
