Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
