I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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